It is 9.30pm on a Sunday evening and I’m lay in bed wondering what I can do to not go to work in the morning… As I catch up on the missed months on my blog you’ll see that as of August 18th I went back to work. I wanted to go back to work that day. I don’t want to go to work tomorrow. Here’s why;
- I miss Alfie. I spent nearly 9 months off on Maternity Leave enjoying spending everyday with him. Watching him grow, learn, change, get cheekier… If I could put him in my bag and take him to work with me I would.
- I feel guilty. For many reasons, I feel guilty that he doesn’t get to spend as much time with his mummy and daddy, that we are both tired at the end of the day, that we have to do boring jobs instead of sitting and playing, the list of reasons why I feel guilty could go on forever!
- I don’t want to miss anything. I saw Alfie’s first smiles. I saw Alfie first sit up, I heard Alfie first say mama, dada, baba, hiya, yeah, eyes (strange one I know!) We taught him to crawl, we spent hours on the floor encouraging him and I can’t imagine missing out on his other milestones. I don’t want the first time he walks to be for the childminder. I want to see it first.
- I miss going to see our mummy and baby friends! As of tomorrow three of our group of five mummies will be back at work. The other two mums work part time and I’m the only one that works full time so far, so I’m not as flexible to meet up. I miss it! I want to get up in the morning and go and meet them all for lunch, not go to the office!
- I don’t want to leave Alfie at the childminders. Alfie’s childminder, Julie, is amazing. This is absolutely nothing against her, it is just me missing him. Two days last week Alfie cried when we left him. I cried too. It broke my heart and I wanted to just turn around, pick him up, take him home and us enjoy the day together. But I couldn’t. I don’t want Alfie to cry when I leave him.
- It’s boring! Quite frankly work is boring at the moment. I have very little to do and I would much rather be at home doing something else or spending time as a family than clock watching at my desk!
- I want to clean the house!!!! Yes, you read that correctly! With working full time that leaves the evenings and weekends to clean… Well I don’t want to waste my Alfie time cleaning, so things have slacked in the house cleaning. No visitors allowed this week thank you!
- I desperately want to go part time. This isn’t possible. I wish it was and I’m very tempted to look for a part time job just so I don’t have to be at work all of the time! Heaven knows what we will do if we have a Baby Fox no.2!
- I’m not a morning person and neither is Alfie. Alfie doesn’t mind waking at 5am, but if you want him to wake at 6.45am to feed and get dressed to go to the childminders it is flipping impossible. Most mornings we have to wake Alfie to get him ready and it’s horrible. I hate mornings so that makes it ten times worse! If only I started work at lunchtime instead…
- The weekend went too fast. How is it Sunday evening already? I even had Friday off! Give me back my weekend Mr Time!
Wish me luck getting up in the morning!
Or send me some excuses to ring in work with…
Mummy Fox xx